I started my first blog when I was 19.
It was just some small part of the big world where I would write my moody poetry, share what stood out to me in the Sunday sermon, and attempt to spread some love and inspiration to those who needed it most.
Although the platforms have changed 100 times, the email lists have grown and shrunk, the writing has started and stopped, the work itself hasn’t really changed much.
I still write moody poems, share about my spiritual discoveries (with less absolutism), and aspire to inspire with my words.
But what is so fascinating to me is that I cannot for the life of me find the line between building a business and staying in the creative flow of writing more creatively.
It feels like when one is flowing, the other runs dry.
I had been deeply in flow in this space, longer than I had been in years.
Then one day, my energy shifted, my inspiration widened, and all of a sudden, I could see the direction my career wanted me to follow.
& like I always do, I struggled to know where my business self ended, and my solely creative self began. A true wondering if the people who love to hear about what nature is revealing to me are the same people who want to hear about my workshops and coaching opportunities.
Are my Substack subscribers the same as my email list, or are they two separate communities held together with me in the middle?
I’m still not quite sure.
There is part of me that believes that if I were truly in authentic flow, creating from the same place for everything, then it would be more seamless.
The other half of me LOVES my multitudes.
I love that I have multiple voices and experiences from which to speak through.
I love that I can write a KILLER sales email and also a moving short story or personal revelation, and they don’t sound the same, but they both sound like me.
It’s like a superpower to tap into the different parts of my journey and express different pieces of myself.
And yet, I find myself here writing this exact piece of work, almost like a journal entry, where I seek to find the answer, but still come up confused.
So maybe, with no answer in hand, I just send this and all the emails I have drafted out into the world, remind myself none of it is really that serious, and trust that you will tell me what you love.
I will keep writing in all the spaces and places when the timing feels right and trust that even when I don’t know what is “right,” every message reaches the person it was written for, even in my wondering.
I am not sure what comes next in this space, but I guess that’s the fun of it; we get to find out together.
Chat soon (probably haha)
Ady
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